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When you walk out the door in the morning and see this in the sky.....
....just go back inside have another coffee, and stay at home. It's not going to be a good day.
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This is Serious!This incident happened recently in North Texas .
A woman went boating one Sunday taking with her some cans of coke which she put into the refrigerator of the boat. On Monday she was taken to the hospital and placed in the Intensive Care Unit. She died on Wednesday.
The autopsy concluded she died of Leptospirosis.. This was traced to the can of coke she drank from, not using a glass. Tests showed that the can was infected by dried rat urine and hence the disease Leptospirosis.
Rat urine contains toxic and deathly substances..... It is highly recommended to thoroughly wash the upper part of all soda cans before drinking out of them. The cans are typically stocked in warehouses and transported straight to the shops without being cleaned..
A study at NYCU showed that the tops of all soda cans are more contaminated than public toilets (i.e).. full of germs and bacteria. So wash them with water before putting them to the mouth to avoid any kind of fatal accident.
1. Queen Elizabeth II has a rubber duck in her private bath with an inflatable crown.
2. A sneeze can travel as fast as 100 miles per hour.
3. The fingerprints of koala bears are virtually indistinguishable from those of humans, so much so that they could be confused at a crime scene.
4. Polar bears can eat more than 50 lbs. of meat in one seating.
5. One percent of Greenland ’s population lives in a single apartment building!
6. Chained dogs are three times more likely to bite than unchained dogs.
7. Most of a hog’s sweat glands are in its snout.
8. It has been estimated that the fear of the number 13 costs Americans more than US$ 1 billion per year.
9. 55.2% of us will let someone else come in the bathroom while they’re using the toilet.
10. One punishment for an adulterous wife in medieval France was to make her chase a chicken through town naked.
11. Baskin Robbins once made ketchup ice cream.
12. 15% of Americans secretly bite their toes.
13. The flea can jump 350 times its body length, that is like a human jumping the length of a football field.
14. Each day, more than US$ 40 Trillion changes hands worldwide.
15. The first product that the toy company Mattel came out with was picture frames.
16. The aorta, the largest artery in the body, is almost the diameter of a garden hose.
17. 4.5 pounds of sunlight strike the Earth each day.
18. All the swans in England are the property of the Queen.
19. A male baboon can kill a leopard.
20. Perspiration is odorless; it is the bacteria on the skin that creates an odor.
21. Each nostril of human being register smell in a different way. Smells that are made from the right nostril are more pleasant than the left.
22. The inventor of the Waffle Iron did not like waffles.
23. Ancient Egyptians slept on pillows made of stone.
24. The dot over the letter “i” is called a tittle.
25. A snail can sleep for three years.
26. There are 365 steps on the front of the US Capitol Building- one for every day of the year.
27. A baby octopus is about the size of a flea at birth.
28. Many people in parts of China eat insects. Some of the common insects are bean worms, scorpions and locusts.
29. The average 1 ¼ lb. lobster is 7 to 9 years old.
30. 80% of Americans will be the victim of violent crime at least once in their lifetime.
31. According to US F.D.A standards, 1 cup of orange juice is allowed to contain 10 fruit fly eggs, but only 2 maggots.
32. Ears of corn always have an even number of rows of kernels.
33. Women wishing to enter Canada to work as strippers must provide naked photos of themselves to qualify for a visa!
34. If the chemical sodium is dropped into water it will immediately and violently explode.
AMO: Inday, bakit mo binenta yung sira na silya?
INDAY: I have computed the chair's fair value less cost to sell, and the value in use using projections for 5 years and a pretax discounting rate. Accordingly, the value in use is lower, so I decided to sell the chair. This is in accordance with PAS 18 on Revenue, PAS 16 on PPE and PAS 36 on Impairment of Assets.
AMO: Hinimatay!
"Nurture others with positive truthful words, not words that hurt. It doesn't cost anything to do so. But mean what you say, and say what you mean. Do it everyday. This is one of the most obvious qualities of the most beloved people. If you cannot be generous financially, at least be generous with your words."
-sagot ni inday sa amo nya na di xa pinautang at minura-mura pa!
"I believe that my trained skills and expertise in management with the use of standard tools, and my discipline and experience will contribute significantly to the value of the work that you want, my creativity, productivity and work-efficiency and the high quality of outcomes I can offer will boost the work progress."
- sagot ni Inday sa interview ng bago niyang amo!
"The consistency was fine. But you see, it seems that the increased amount of sodium chloride (NaCl) affected the taste drastically and those actions are irreversible. I do apologize."
- nag-explain si Inday kung bakit maalat ang ulam.
Donya: Bakit tuwing paguwi ko, nadadatnan kitang nanunuod ng tv?!
Inday: "Because I don't want you to see me doing absolutely nothing."
"It's absurd! It was never a fact that he will inflict a fight. I can only imagine how you handle schizophrenic kids on this educational institution. Revise your policies because they suck!"
- Inday, kasama si Junior sa principal's office.
Amo: Inday, bakit nagkalat ang basura sa likod ng bahay?!
"Inday: A change in the weather patterns might have occurred wrecking havoc to the surroundings. The way the debris are scattered indicates that the gust of wind was going northeast causing damage to the path it was heading for."
Amo: (nosebleed)
"Stop your raucous behavior. It is bound to result in property damages and if that happens there will be corresponding punishment to be inflicted upon you!"
- si Inday, pinagbabawalan ang mga bata na maglikot.
"To forrestall further hopes of acquaintance, my unfathomable statement to the denial of your request. Petition denied."
- reply ni Inday nang i-text ni dodong kung pwede sya maging txtmate.
"I stay awake in the coldness of the darkened sky contemplating why, for some reasons, has my emptiness made itself manifests, extending to that niche where I was given life and growth, that because of austerity I was made separated from…"
- Inday… hindi makatulog dahil nahohomesick
"I am solitary. I find it hard to succumb into slumber, though the downpour of rain should've made it easy. This exuberant emotional glue I have for you, cannot be simply washed away. The multiplicity of what I feel for you is inevitable. This isn't platonic. It's real, true romance."
- Inday, nageemote sa may bintana, habang iniisip si Dodong, ang boyfriend niya
"The statute restricts me to love you but you have the provocation. The way you smile is the proximate cause why I love you. We have some rules to think of. We have no vested rights to love each other because the upper household dismissed my petition!"
- ganito nakipagbreak si Inday kay Dodong (driver ng kapitbahay)
Amo: Inday bumili ka nga ng mga isda.. o nga pla inglesira ka… would you please purchase many fishes for our this week's meals?
Inday: Judging from your statement I believe you meant a variety of fish. The term "fishes", although rarely and even erroneously used, connotes a plethora or an array of different kinds of the aforementioned gilled creatures. But the more pressing questions before I traveresed the road to the wet market would be: What certain type of fish? Fillet or not? Frozen or just right smack the day's catch? (Pauses) Aaah… by manner of careful extrapolation, given the meager budget in this houshold's quasi-peasant middle class taste, I assume then I will source the staple "galewng-gowng". Am I correct?
Amo: Leche!
Inday: You meant the freshwater milkfish? Then the "ba-ngooz" is it!
"La vida no es una broma actualmente. El dinero es tan duro de pasar. Puede usted bajar el precio parci mi? Soy ya su compradora avido diario por favor?
- si Inday tumatawad sa merkado ng isinama siya ng amo sa España
*Drunken shrimp and blue lobster meat with caviar serve with milagrosa rice (red avriety) and apricot sauce
*Vegetables in balsamic vinegar splashed with extra virgin olive olive
*Lychee and peach salad with sour cream cheese topped with lemon zests
- baon ni Junior sa daycare na inihanda ni Inday
"Bloody hell!!! What the f*ck did just landed on my cutie top? I mean I've spent all day just to make myself look fabulous. I think I'll have this eewy thing removed in a whip wham of time!"
- reaction ni Inday nung natalsikan sya ng mantika habang nagluluto ng tilapia
"Ipomea aquatica has become the constant ingredient to this Filipino delicacy which is very helpful in the digestion during the peristaltic process of the food we intake. Due to the continuous rains and floods, the harvest of the said vegetable has lessen the production in the market."
- banat ni Inday kung bakit walang "kangkong" sa nilutong sinigang
"Heavy fire that exerted by the stimulus affect the best conductor of heat which is the steel, causing the "oriza sativa" which is the scientific name of rice to change its state of color, smell as well as the taste."
- sagot ni Inday nang tanungin siya ng amo kung bakit nasunog ang sinaing
"Off you go! Under no circumstance this house would relent to such unabashed display of vagrant destitution!"
- si Inday, pinapaalis ang makulit na pulubi sa gate… (Taray talaga ni Inday!)
"Allergens triggered the immune response. Eosinophilic migration occurs to the reaction site and release of chemotactic and anaphylotoxin including histamine and prostaglandins. These substance results to increase circulation to the site promoting redness."
- sagot ni inday nun tanungin ni sir kung bakit may rashes si Junior
Amo: Day! Bakit may bukol si Junior?!
Inday: Compromising safety with useless aesthetics, the not-so-well engineered architectural design of our kitchen lavatory affected the boy's cranium with a slight boil at the left temple near the auditory organ.
Amo: (Di nakareact)
Amo: Inday di ba nanood ka ng The Buzz kahapon? Bkit daw umalis si Angel Locsin sa GMA7?
Inday: Sometimes people choose to leave not because of selfish reasons but because they just know that things will get worse if they'll stay. Leaving can be a tough act and it's harder when people can't understand you for doing so.
"Physical stress and excessive work may result to serious damage to one's body. It is therefore essential that once in a while we take a break from our usual routine to replenish the lost energy we once had."
- sabi ni Inday sa amo noong humingi siya ng dayoff
"Dear Mom,
Had it not been for the smelling salt, I must have collapsed moment ago. Junior has become a little monster to me. Remember the head accident he had? As if it wasn't enough, he was summoned by the principal of his shabily run academe. Oh such an erudite bunch of baboons! I never lot being a governess can be such a strenuous employ.
Your daughter,
Inday"
"Dear Inday,
Walanghiya ka! Magpadala ka ng pera! Nasa ospital nanay mo, dumugo ang ilong kababasa ng pesteng sulat mo!
Tatay"
1. Money isn't made out of paper. It's made out of cotton.
2 The Declaration of Independence was written on hemp (marijuana) paper
3. The dot over the letter 'I' is called a 'tittle'.
4. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top.
5. Susan Lucci is the daughter of Phyllis Diller.
6. 40% of McDonald's profits come from th e sales of Happy Meals.
7. 315 entries in Webster's 1996 Dictionary were misspelled.
8. The 'spot' on 7-UP comes from its inventor, who had red eyes. He was albino.
9. On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents, daily.
10. Warren Beatty and Shirley MacLaine are brother and sister.
11. Chocolate affects a dog's heart and nervous system; a few ounces will kill a small sized dog.
12. Orcas (killer whales) kill sharks by torpedoing up into the shark's stomach from underneath, causing the shark to explode.
13. Most lipstick contains fish scales (eeww).
14. Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
15. Ketchup was sold in the 1830's as medicine.
16. Upper and lower case letters are named 'upper' and 'lower' because in the time when all original print had to be set in individual letters, the 'upper case' letters were stored in the case on top of the case that stored the smaller, 'lower case' letters.
17. Leonardo Da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other at the same time hence, multitasking was invented.
18. Because metal was scarce, the Oscars given out during World War II were made of wood.
19. There are no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos.
20. The name Wendy was made up for the book Peter Pan; there was never a recorded Wendy before!
21. There are no words in the dictionary that rhyme with: orange, purple, and silver!
22. Leonardo DaVinci invented scissors. Also, it took him 10 years to paint Mona Lisa's lips.
23. A tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion will make it instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
24. The mask used by Michael Myers in the original 'Halloween' was a Captain Kirk's mask painted white.
25. If you have three quarters, four dimes, and four pennies, you have $1.19 You also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar (good to know.)
26. By raising your legs slowly and lying on your back, you can't sink in quicksand (and you thought this list was completely useless.)
27. The phrase 'rule of thumb' is derived from an old English law, which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.
28. The first product Motorola started to develop was a record player for automobiles. At that time, the most known player on the market was the Victrola, so they called themselves Motorola.
29. Celery has negative calories! It takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it to begin with. It's the same with apples!
30. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying!
31. The glue on Israeli postage stamps is certified kosher.
32. Guinness Book of Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from Public Libraries.
33. Astronauts are not allowed to eat beans before they go into space because passing wind in a space suit damages it. I NEED TO REMEMBER THIS.
34. George Carlin said it best about Martha Stewart. 'Boy, I feel a lot safer now that she's behind bars. OJ Simpson and Kobe Bryant are still walking around; Osama Bin Laden too, but they take the ONE woman in America willing to cook, clean, and work in the yard, and they haul her fanny off to jail.
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